Wednesday, May 11, 2011

What's this? A blog post? It couldn't be!

Yeah, I've been neglecting this. I kinda knew I would eventually. Gimme a break, I'm in school. Once it's over (two weeks!) I'll make it a point to post more. As for now, it's gonna be kinda dead. Bye bye now.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

I've got a wiggly worm in the back of my head

I've got a wiggly worm in the back of my head,
That tells me what to do.

I've got a wiggly worm in the back of my head,
That says to not trust you.

I've got a wiggly worm; his name is Ted.
He's a pink little worm; he lives in my head.

I've got a wiggly worm in the back of my head.
Do you?

Saturday, February 26, 2011

I've created an animal.

This is a new species of ox. It is called a Boffice Ox.

Looks like a regular ol' ox, doesn't it? Well, it isn't. It is an ox, but this species of ox was born with a fun birth defect! Instead of making whatever noise an ox makes, it makes a hideous noise that sounds like "boffice." Therefore, it is the Boffice Ox.

He's precious.

Friday, February 25, 2011

What's wrong with you people??

I posted an angry blog a few days ago. It was really more of a personal one that my mom made me post, so that the idiot I was writing about wouldn't take me to court.

Well, I decided to check my stats  the next day and saw that it was the only post I ever made that had almost as many posts as my first post. It made more posts in one day than any of my posts made in the time since I posted them. What the hell?

That angry post wasn't even a real post! Why do you people like it so much? Why does anger attract more people than humor? I would rather look at something humorous than angry. Angry people just put me in a bad mood. I don't like to be in a bad mood. Humor makes me giggle. I like to giggle.

I like to rant just as much as the next person, but usually I only like to rant to a friend. I don't want to rant to strangers because they probably don't want to listen to it. Neither do my friends, but by becoming my friend, they made an agreement to help with and listen to all my problems.

I don't care about how much you hate or love Justin Bieber. I'll be a little interested if you love him, because you have problems.
I don't care how bad that new movie in theaters was. If I wanna go see it, I'll go see it! Don't ruin the fun by telling me if I'm going in there to have my life changed, or if I'm going to have the greatest night ever because I picked a shitty movie.

(Gonna change subjects abruptly here.)
I love that with movies, you ALWAYS win. You either see a good film or a bad film. The good film is awesome because it was good. Either it made you cry, laugh, or shit your pants. You always feel high and mighty because YOU JUST SAW AN AWESOME FILM. The good film may suck, but it provides an hour and a half of entertainment. You can't not laugh at a bad movie. Plus, you feel high and mighty because YOU JUST SAW A BOX OFFICE FAILURE. (I just wanted to type "office box so bad, but I was afraid I was wrong so I googled it and saw that I had typed it backwards.)

I just completely rambled, didn't I? Well, that's what you get when I get high and then blog.

That's all folks!

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Society is becoming dumber and dumber...and we're happy about it?

If you use Facebook, you may have noticed all these "like" pages. Some of these says things like "like this if you've ever pushed a door that said pull"; "like this if you've ever fallen up the stairs."

What the hell? I mean, I new people were stupid, but to admit to it, and even be proud of it? My God, what is the world coming to.

Okay, it is NOT CUTE to be dumb. It's just annoying. Well, some guys may have sex with you because they like dumb girls, but they will not be in a relationship with you. And if they do go out with you, it won't last long. Because you are an annoying slut and after awhile you're whole, "I don't know good math LOLZ" thing will start to get old.

I just really think stupid people are a waste of time. No matter how good looking they are. People may start to like you because of your looks, but if you don't have substance, they will easily get tired of you.

So do the world, and yourself, a favor, and read a fucking book.

A fun post. Animals as human stereotypes.

I was trying to sleep and instead decided to come up with human stereotypes that some animals represent. I may add more to this list, or continue it in a new post. Enjoy!

  • Hyena - the annoying friend
  • Birds - the cocky sonofabitch
  • Lion - the women's rights activists
  • Female gorilla - the dyke
  • Penguin - the hopeless romantic
  • Dog - the adorable idiot
  • Cat - the destroyer of worlds
  • Whale - the gospel singer
  • Black widow - that lady who brutally murdered her husband and got away with it
  • Rabbit - the sex addict
  • Dolphin - the intellectual
  • Sloth - the hungover college kid
  • Cheetah - fastest black guy on the track team
More soon, maybe? I really need to focus on this dang blog more!